waiting for my muse in a dark alley with an aluminum bat

unedited pure neanderthal musings NeANDERThallus's DONut EDiT!!! historical records from my cave walls... brutality, menial labor, minor victories, hot sexy interludes....... 3 years on the edges of a society that i cant distance myself enough from

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since 2005 i've been picking at this keyboard. the thoughtstreams flow, who knows from whence they came, or to whence they go? enjoy the ride...... i am

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

my aura glows prettily with each passing day of poverty for this is the road to success in this world. one must become so disgusted with the way things are that he or she sets out to change the planet, buddha did it the cool way, walking into the woods from a life of prosperity. he had a bit of a safety net tho, he could always go back to his wife and kids and his part of the kingdom. its not as noticable when a nobody drops out of society. no ones looking for homeless charlie, but they know where to find him and if hes not there theres a whole set of assumptions and judgements and commentary about his chosen life style. its actually pretty exciting to be doing nothing important with my life right now. when i did the important job it set new high blood pressure marks in all the doctors offices i found myself in. walking around like a time bomb, getting drunk and high as much as possible, playing rugby on the weekend frequently also drunk and high and teaching in he hood. I was a bomb waiting to go off and i almost did that day on the stretcher when they kept me in the hospital an extra day and threatened a second night of incarceration if my number did not go under 100.
so i meditated and relaxed and calmed and got it where it had to be and moved on.
so there must be a cosmic reason for me not to have that stroke
yeah
cuz im an important man in some corners of the cosmos
you earth cats just aint hip to it yet
as you destroy your paradise and turn it into a festering shit hole
caught in the illusion of greed
which is an animal impulse that does not infect spiritually clean entities
thats why you were put here on this paradise
to see what sort of caretaker you would be
to see if you can be trusted in the more fragile yet breathtakingly beutiful corners of the universe where you can see the wind and that smell just before a heavy snow is just the beginning of the aromatic banquet
where everyone is fulfilling their truest natures and its so good you need a break from all that happiness because happiness is a drug almost as bad as greed
smiling all the time llike ental patients or people on prozac
yeah get me some prozac
i want to know that everyything is ok even when it so clearly is not
i want to be blissfully unaware that there are too many bunnies in this particular hutch.
that even adorable bunnies, when overpopulated, turn cannibalistic
i want to witness the cosmic payback to you foul creatures who populate this world
im working undercover for the galactic press
galactic press update
GPU- Earthlings today again ignored the death throes of their planet, genocide seems to be the only thing they are good at. But they fail to realize that the planet isnt quite dead yet and still has a few defenses left and here comes the latest,

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