applying for a job is like asking a chick out
they lie to you about ficticious boyfriends when they say they will put your application on file, or are going to review your resume and call you back for an interview.
getting the job is the same well. all of a sudden you are getting what you want out of a relationship as the relationship slowly changes your behaviors and personality as you try to become a cog in her universe/in the corporate behemoth.
inevitably they both dump you and it hurts on some level even if it wasnt the right job/broad for you. people tell you get back up on the horse, everyone needs to work/love.
so you take your whipped ass out there, trying not to flinch as an oft-beaten cur is wont to.
you start talking to fatter women and applying for shittier jobs. And when those inevitably turn you down you start asking the homeless guy on the corner if there is room in his organization for someone of your caliber. a real go getter.
you can practically hear the beaten dog whimpering "hire me please" when you hold my resume in your hands. "i wont pee on your rug, or chew your shoes."

accomplishments-did not murder ANY eigth grade gangsta wannabes
-went to work every day(most weeks)
-tried to teach every day in chaos
-tolerated beauracratic doubletalk...no i didnt do that one...i had a fairly contentious relationship with any administrator who tried to "yes' me or "ill look into that" me.
i kept my attacks on a professional level which made me enemies in the office which met my needs to be a radical but in no way made my life easier at the job. they were making my job harder with their lack of aptitude in their chosen profession, and i shared my expertise with them at many a meeting.
which is why i was "written up" for missing consecutive days at that absentee heaven that io worked at. of corse people are taking days off when the kids are running rampant. setting fires, pulling trains, bringing knives or bullets or razors. half of the kids were high at any given time, so of course people are taking days off.
the memo noted that my absence was a burden to to other staff members in their goal to meet standards and push achievement forward. ok. so i replied in a note to her, for my file, that i was sorry to make things harder for others, but at the time i was in the hospital and was not allowed to go home until it was under 100. that that was me wheeled out on a stretcher after i was seeing spots, went to the nurse, and set him scurrying around the office and to the principal because my blood pressure was thru the roof. the nurse who wondered why i wasn't having a stroke yet. i guess i am not a team player, i continued and i will personally apologize to each member of the staff for my transgression, for not being tough enough, for letting the team down. when i started doing that very thing i thought for sure i would win employee of the month, or team player of the year awards,but that did not happen....
as i looked in the greeting card store for a card that said that..."sorry that my hospitalization let the team down" i was again dissappointed by the greeting card industry. they never have the cards people like me need in their fast paced lives and romances
"forgiveness and best wishes in your new posting, bishop horndog."
"thanks for the bail(on a postcard from vegas)"
"i love you, you f*cking c*nt"
"i'll replace the windows, sweetie"
"it was (insert family member here)'s fault, "
"i thought YOU gave them to me" comes with a bottle of shampoo and tiny comb
"sorry about the concussion at rugby practice"
"sorry i eFFed your girl friend"
and "sorry you cant sit down without pain, i was being passionate"