anonymus harmless drunk at a barbeque
amuses the two year old with his facial expressions
plays a little rough at times because two year old cant catch too good
his punk rock mama with the pink hair watches
discusses
helps him "shake it off"
her drummer boyfriend manning the barbeque chimes in
yes he plays the chimes too
very talented indeed
says that this is what the kid needs
simple drummer wisdom
apparently the kid is a wuss
and needs to toughen up
and another great business idea is born into the world
rent a drunken uncle
we will come to your family gathering and be the focus of attention and dersision as long as the alcohol flows freely
we're great with kids
not the kind of uncle that gives a kid nightmares and serious sexual issues down the road
thats another company
were the dudes that give your unruly teenagers an "accidental" black eye in the basketball game that got to rough
sorry dude, my bad
man up, ya pussy, or are ya gonna quit?
dont get any blood on the basketball
drunken uncle is just one of the services we provide at DRUNKLE CO. incorporated

we also are masters at playing the
"what does she see in him" game

we can be you latest bad boyfreind

you have a big even coming up, need a date and need a family member put in their place?

we can do it.
not for nothing, but your daughter really thinks.....
you can pretend one of our experts is projecting, guessing or just being an obnoxious drunk and of course you really dont think that..
not at all
once the conversational faux pas has been remedied the elephant is still in the room
the cat is out of the bag and the healing can begin
you can discuss the "drunk talk" later at a more appropriate time and really get to the bottom of your thorny private family issues
all we need is some beer, and our nominal consulting fee and your family can become stronger
stronger by weathering our pateneted drunken storms
storms bring out the best in people
to survive repeated visits from the inebriation professionals at DRUNKLE CO your family will have to rally round, will have to work together to communicate
to save their daughter from this horrid man she is in love with
and thats the magic of DRUNKLE CO
we build stronger family ties
surprisingly affordable and only just as violent and destructive and spelled out in our pre-intervention contract
see how strong your family can become with just a few quick visits
need to get back into the will?
want them to forget your previous mistakes?
is your teen a poofter?
are your brothers drunken bullies at family gatherings?
have a porsche that needs vomitting on?
call DRUNKLE CO TODAY!