a ferret stares back
i look again
a deformed ferret
curled like half a paperclip
looks like it tried to swallow a golfball
and choked to death
on the golfball
and then somehow found its way into my toilet bowl
no way that came out of me
but, yes
theres a drop of blood floating on the water
more on the toilet paper
how did that ever come out of me?
damn you brett farve!
damn you and your oxycodone addiction
i know it fucks up my plumbing
but the bottle of pills was just sitting there in the box of trash
and the alluring labels
each labels warning, sung by an angel
circling my head
may cause drowsiness
may cause drowsiness
do not mix with alcohol
do not mix with alcohol
do not operate heavy machinery
never the machinery
no workee dah machinery
jah jah
no workee duh machinery
a chorus of angels singing to me
each with her song
the last angel all dreadlocked out
my rastafarian angel
who torments me
as i prepare for a drug test
for the corporate bar gig that may or may not happen
that rastafarian angel is mad because i got the hook up now
the sticky bud
the dank
the k bee
(the kind bud)
that hydro
that haze
blueberry, northern lights
or any genetic variation thereof
in my hands withing a fracttion of a day
and i cant do it cuz i gotta work
dont they know ima friggin artiste'?
that i need my brain food?
and how the hell did that ferret get in my toilet tank?
is this how prison will feel?
torn rectal tissues
rectal bleeding
that shit took twenty minutes to ease out
glaciers move quicker
i think it must have hit bottom there
like an anal kick stand
and halted progress
before i had the nerve to push a little
"its coming out now
i see it
its crowning
push baby now push"
thats it
what is it what is it?
mr baker
its a ferret
dont worry about the misshapen head
that'll fuse together in the next couple of weeks
remember not to give any noogies to your lil guy for a few

ive had quite vivid dreams
when ive chased those pills with vodka
memorable dreams that i dont remember now
one was a repeat
the meaning of life one
where i discover whats its all about
after a series of trials
and breakthroughs
it was a repeat tho
and i wasnt ready for it, spiritually, at this time
possessing as i do now a storm battered, skeptical, wheezing, limping into port kind of spirit now
a spirit in need of some lemon limey effervessence
in need of some fresca
where is my fresca of the soul?
id like a case please

the pills are the ticket to dreamland
but at what cost?
any time i started sitting down yesterday i had to do so tenderly
easing the inflamed tissue to the chair
i dont know if the dreams are worth it
and im suddenly allergic to ferrets