the bluejays are huge from all the cat food they've been feasting on
even saw a little catbird in the food bowl too
the jays are loud and raucous, like seventh graders
i put the dish under a chair on the front porch and thought id foiled them
but dems wily boids dey iz
i came upon a jay under the chair on the porch
screeching at me as he flew away
azz azz hole
AZZ AZZ HOLE

the two fat ones would flutter throught the treetops as i sat on the porch with the cat
on surveillance missions
and seeing me put them in ill humr
even if i stayed completely still
i came up with a new theory about eyes and tried it out
i put a stuffed bear out there,
sitting in a chair above the food,
to see what they'd do
it seemed to be working
i wasnt filling the catfood dish multiple times anymore
but i did see one of the fat ones on the porch hopping over
son of a bitch
now the bear is on the floor next to the dish
it would take one bold bird to defeat this security measure
we shall see
it takes a bird brain to out think a bird
and the fucking deer ate my cabbage
it was so pretty yesterday
now its practically a stump
GRRRRR
varmints!