someone is activating my funcodes

i feel like a labrador retriever on trash day

you want to talk a great workout
try walking a 120 lb chocolate lab on trash day
labs live for that shit
they listen for a minute or so
then they forget
you relax and pow
he's yanking your arm out of your socket
its a good inner shoulder workout
it targets the cartilage in your inner shoulder
do three reps with each arm

i find myself working out again

something in the air
id like to look better without a shirt
just in case that scenario should arise
which is a major change from the "fuck you everyone sucks" way of relating to the world that had such a powerful hold on me from time to time these last few....

i made a successful foray into my gambling enterprise.
business
im in the poker business?
im in the poker business
maybe
its an entry level position
not even an internship
its an unpaid internship that actually costs me money to participate in
kinda lke college
you pay them over tim and they try to get you some money later
im cutting out the middle man
cutting through the paperwork
i put down 120 and they give me 404 six hours later and that was only due to some outrageous good fortune and some outrageously bad play on my part at the end

I Coulda(shudda wooda) Made Thousands EASILY

let me repeat that sentence........easily


ICMTE
i see empty
i see empty is the name of our organization and our initials
i c empty and the last e is silent
what do we see empty?
my wallet
humanities future
your bed
we as an organization at ICMTE strongly believe in filling these three things with rewarding and enriching experiences
if my job is one day a week and i could easily make thousands then coming home with nothig os ok for a month or two while i learn my trade
a month or tow of serious mental effort, ONCE A WEEK
then i can dick around the rest of the time and work on my various side projects.....
because
you see
i am a very important blogger
i know people
but to show up in my blog it means you dont suck
except in the finest way humanly possible
except in the most selfless of all selfless acts
so
keep on not sucking world

when you dont suck too bad i may have something nice to say about you

otherwise i can see a summer of sweaty prose about the end of the world
which seem to write themselves as i stew in my juices here at the hideout
at the safe house
i provide a service to my fellow man
i am a friggin humanitarian of the highest order
especially now

the higherest order
skun k to tha deezil
ok

back to my very important blog
frogs and bats are dying
the oceoan is changing its PH more radically than it has in 650 million years
yeah
ahh progress
we can age an ocean faster than room full of razorblades, toddlers and trampolines
so the question to us all as modern humans is what time is it?
is it 1999?
life is just a paty and parties werent meant to last
rock out with your cock out?
ride the warhead down towards moscow whoopping and a hollerin and a wavng your cowboy hat?
or save your cardboard..buy funny looking lightbulbs...dont buy cotton, meat or diamonds
live on nothing but the morning dew and fairydust

one way is a lot more fun
one way is a lot more spiritual
but even st augustine had his confessions
if i kill a polar bear next week and eat its brain as sushi its only because i heard that prince song again
1999
and was reminded of the dying aphibains, bats and iceshelves
and said fuck it for a night
and i heard that polar bear brain sushi is the ultimate trip
their brains secrete a substance called brain freeze which insulate thier brains from the snow but give humans an everlasting buzz
damn that 5 foot minnesotian
ok i name dropped prince, st augutine, toodlers and polar bears
thats enough for the day
i dont really know prince but i pad to see him sing twice so i own a very small piece of his soul
i read some of the confessions but they put me to sleep more than anything
i see empty
incorporated
all rights reserved
fully bonded
llc
ltd
ufo
pdq

theres something in the air that the birds zestfully comment on each morning
something ive been noticing in my own trollish manner
certainly the asses have begun to bloom
i stood on a corner watching the lovelies walk to work
they know it
i may have to do that again soon
all fresh and coiffed and pressed tugged for fit
all presenting thier best face and pace to the world
achievers
i love to watch them walk by
determined
too lovely to speak too
too important to harass
NOT FOR DOGS
thats what my great aunt would say
as she shooed her cocker spaniel sunny
away from the people food
i hear her voice and smile
i know they are not for me
they would never understand my lassitude
my season of seasoning
my rest phase
ill have the energy to tackle large things when they arise
thats all i did on the rugby field
tackle large problems
ill do it when i have too
or at a time of my choosing the best option for me
now it is to hang loose
harvest some low hanging fruits
make tiny plans

so i stand on the corner with my modifed, respectable, leer
obvious types dressed for mans work vocalize and point in noisy groups as they walk to get their breakfasts on break
my appreciation is more subtle
eye contact and a brief smile before looking away is about all you can hope for
yeah i was looking
yeah u caught me
but im shy and respectful and dam you are such an eye treat that i just had to
im not dead here

so i started the day feeling spry
possibilities in the air
did my little tennis assebly for the cute little quaker spawn
made kids smile from their accomplishments
busted a move
helped a friend in need for most of the day
was heading home
in the briliant sunshine
just under 80
a perfect afternoon for ambulation
the bus rolls by
steps away
i could run
but its too nice
god must want me to go to happy hour

there was definitely something in the air
i was reminded that i can be attractive again
im polishing my dancing shoes and firing up a few sonnets
there is serious fun in the air and i mean to get me some
who knows how long the dance will last?
the important thing is dancing gracefully
flowing with your partners energy
coaxing out her inner athleticism
reigniting your own
loading the plane with love naplam
the same i smelled this morning
the same that made the birdies chirp
just gotta find me a fireproof hottie
or one with sexy asbestos toe fingers
who wants to dance with a neanderthal man

really not sure if its an audition or not

do people really act this way?
or do they insist on maing the blog?
homo-waiters with rugby shirts
spoiled hi school weirdos
drunken blabbermouths

i try to ignore them
but my interactions with my fellow humans all have a surreal quality
im just trying to do me
exist in my groove
leave nothing but footprints
take nothing but mental pictures

ill leave this electronic footprint out here

but thats about it
survival among the insane is a tricky wobbling tightrope wire act in hi winds

umm, yeahhh
im going a different way with the soundtrack of my developing insanity
we like what you brought into the room
but we were looking for a little more zazz

zazz hands

make me believe your psychosis
i get your basic premise
but its undeveloped
add some details

thanks for your time tho

the stench of failure stops burning your nose and lungs after a few years of teaching in the phladelphia school system
you barely notice that desparate pugency somewhere around your third or fourth year
all that wasted effort
all those fresh college graduates who want to help
the system is designed to crush their idealism
just as it crushes kids whose destiny is to be the bottom decile of the bell shaped curve, come test time, so that the taxpayers parents wont feel ripped off by their property tax bills with a comma in them