i rearranged my setup and can now get online when my neighbor is on his system
good enough for me
i have a suitcase full of papers from one teaching assignment
a beer case full of college notes
45 notebooks
a pocket organizer full of emptiness
six and a half journals
threee magazine holders of loose things and a small filing system.
basically overwhelmed by twenty years of words
need to sift thru them
somehow recycle the winners
and get the losers back into the world in a different form
if i can get thru some of the backlog
and start the
Medicore American Novel
ill feel better at my shitty job because im making forward progress
so heres the beginning of the Mediocre american novel
the MAN book
redundant for sure
for emphasis
its a novel and a book
about how rugby turned me into a man
about escaping life in this vehicle
about what happens to a person when his escape pod runs out of steam due to the ravages of 20 plus years of rugby on my aging soft body that used to be a missle of muscle
heres the skeleton of the novel then
it wouldnt be my opus if i didnt get sidetracked
i apologize in advance for being sidetracked, but some sentences scream out to be written
i cant avoid their screams
write me harry, im marginally interesting, they cry out
and my fingers follow the thoughts and then ive pissed off another constituancy
ill put the beginning of the MAN BOOK up
and furtively work on it every morning at 4 am
like that suicide guy did in the keys
standing up
facing the day
except i like to sit on my big fat ass
thus the preface is written
On The Pitch
by harry baker
confessions of a rugby whore
The rugby field is referred to properly as the pitch. Things are easier to figure out on the pitch. Life is less complicated, things happen for a reason, even the random things. There are a finite number of variables for you to try to control.
CHAPTER>I was a virgin in my first ever rugby game. Living with my great aunt kitty in Swarthmore. Staying in a in the attic, commuting to community colIege of Philadelphia. Getting pinched by the cops at froggies and crying my way out.
Police raid, Here come the water works, tears which melt a hardened cops heart. Tears so profound that hotties everywhere will be lining up,naked on their knees, five at a time to fellate me. American blowjob is the title of the reality series. I comb the country looking for the best possible head. Different categories to. Best head professional. Best head colege girl division. Best head barely eighteeen division. Best head from a dude. We will let someone else make that seiries
A subcontractor from the gay division of harryco, a loosely owned subsidiary of drunkleco started playing in
So you can se how I link rugby and sexy in my mind, although it is just a coincidence that my cherry in rugby was popped at just about the same time that that secretary at the college introduced me to the world of love. nostalgic loving capter. the first great unrequited loves, growing out of being a little dude wrestling 129 in high school to my present manly behemouthness.
CHAPTER>The coke in argentina was a lot more dangerous than the city blow us tourists were used to. Something about secret police and repressive government shakedowns of tourists and hard time for the dealers. They didn’t want it to appear that there was a problem with it in their country, so the USA could train it’s anti-drug eradication efforts to their neighbors to the north. The old guard sons of Nazis are efficient businessmen. The same old Nazis whose factories lay unbombed during WWII be agreement AND BUSINES TIES WITH THE us GOVERNMENT ARE STILL IN BUSINESS WITH US government today
The bushes have replaced the fords as the people to know over here, the husseins and the jews in the Mideast, the royals in Britannia and the real powers, the swiss bankers and dutch insurance industries.---tuff guy rugby memories here from washington dc,
sex in foreign places, other states, bathrooms at rugby tournaments,
i didnt know the rugby team had a club based on her. all i knew was that she was another TGI Fridays bartender, from the falls church store
all i knew was that she had deep brown eyes and a fabulous smile, all i knew was that we should be going out as young and dnamic and sexy as we both were. we decided to go to a comedy club. i picked her un in my little red toyota starlet. a 550 dollar car that ran forever. my mom felt kinda guilty about my running off to face the world as i did when i dropped out of college at 23. i was too close to the real world. i was a semester from graduation. i was not ready for work every friggin day or the responsibility of taking care of other peoples kids
so i left on thanksgiving eve. everyting interesting happens to me around holidays. my note said "im out of here" i taped it to a bottle of korbel champagne on the kitchen table
my dramatic mom thought it was a suicide note
igot on the bus to dc. i told them the keys to the car were under the seat and headed south
dropped off the face of the earth
heading towards an angel named sunni who lived in dc
spent thanksgigving at the dc bus terminal, long walks thru the hood there looking for a motel...jimmy stewarts wonderful life in a shitty little room on thanksgiving morn then back to the bus station
was about to buy a bus ticket to LA when i dialed her phone number WITHOUT the area code and she seemed happy to hear from me, was in an expensive place and offered me a fouton as we shared nachos at the local TGIF
so we were yukking it
me and the hot Fridays bartender
drinking chilled stoli with sugar coated lemon chasers
what were those tings called?
lemondrops
ahhh lemondrops
we had six or seven of those and made our way out the back door
there was a little hill there
we laid on the grass and started to fool around a little
the show ends and we are laying on the grass and peoples headlights shine on us
now i know how porn stars feel about the lighting
certainl not mood lighting
the little hill is really a drainiage area for the parking lot we surmise
but our passion is unabated
we move down the small hill towards the steel drain in rhythm
like a sexy sexy caterpillar
we finish up i drive her home im such a romantic in these days and so in love all of a sudden im dining below her waistline in the parkinglot of her apartment building
it must have been thirty minutes or so
i was in full love mode
my face was quite sticky
we go to her place and crash
morningloving is the best lovin and or hungover asses start to feel frisky
i sent a scot
always important to send a scout before you dive upon the muff
i stroke her silky butt hairs
thats different
insert the index finger
stroke more
bring him back to report to mr nose and am gagged
almost lose my cookies right there
heinous
so i roll on top, no foreplay, mr rugby lover at work and head to the shower once i cum
in the shower the water hits my member, the scent is overwhelming
i do puke then
in the shower
mostly bile
if she hears my wretching she is very polite not to mention it
and we kiss goodbye and i am still a little queasy
a month or two goes by and i find out the rugby team has a club
the hairy butt club
she seems to dig us rugby players
and it starts to make sense as another barkeep over at her TGIF is also a rugby stud
CHAPTER> in which the author descibes his current love thinking, the hippie redux song seems appropos....if you cant be with the one you love honey, love the one youre with, love the one youre with
Do do do do do do do do do do
as hippy offspring i can find something to love in almost anyone
randomly running into a hottie
starting a convo
being amazed when she responds favorably to my flirtaceous overtures
how does that happen i wonder?
what is wrong with this hotties eyesight, self esteem, sense of smell?
what is her tragic secret that she flirts back with a big fat steaming pile of shit such as myself?
ill find the tragic secret sooner or later.
and when i find it it is up to me to embrace it and start the healing and love her forever, or it is time for us to move on
i am a pleasant person to be around and my sex drive is sooo fucked up by my blood pressure medication as to be non-existant
i got nothing but time to find your sexiness , future hottie lover
and by then maybe i wont be on the blood pressure meds anymore
my recent relationship was a horrible balancing act between taking the antiboner pills and pinning her anarchist ass to the matress on the days when i cleared my system of the fould pharmacists toxic offerings
if we were going to be together later in the week id stop taking the pills a few days in advance and my old friend fuckstick would be ready for action
shed ask me if i was taking my pills the next morning and id cherily lie to her, still smiling about the fornication from the previous evening
ok so thats the outline
i will work on the details every morning and withing a few short seasons i may have some really rough and shitty MAN BOOK written and then i can die happily
having accomplished something
